Comedian Erin Conroy: Home Is Where The Grudge Is...

Comedian Erin Conroy

Monday, April 09, 2007

Home Is Where The Grudge Is...

Happy belated Easter/Passover/season premiere of "The Sopranos". Did you see it? Don't tell me anything-I'm watching it tonight.

I went home to Buffalo this past weekend. Buffalo is freezing cold. I swear to God, I don't ever remember it being that cold when I was a kid. Then again, when I was younger I had my hopes and dreams for the future to keep me warm. And it's just not as easy to stop the heat from escaping your body when you're dead inside.

Besides the bone-chilling cold, Buffalo was a good time as always. These days, it seems there are a few things guaranteed to happen every time I go home for a visit: one of my oldest friends comes one fake eyelash or one "accidental" man-kiss closer to coming out of the closet ; one of my sister's three dogs runs into oncoming traffic; and I end up running into someone I went to grammar school with in a bar, and then trying to pick a fight with them.

It's like clockwork.

I never seem to run into anyone I went to high school with-just middle school and elementary school. It's just as well though, it would seem all the scores I have to settle are from grades 1-8. And you're probably thinking that it would be hard to recognize someone you went to school with 17 years ago. Well you're wrong. You never forget the face of the guy who took your Hostess Fruit Pie out of your lunch and threw it down the hallway. Or the girl who wouldn't let you copy her answers real quick that time you completely forgot to do your homework because you were busy planning "Burger Time" for 6 hours straight the night before. Or the entire mezzo soprano section of the Erie County Chorus. No.....they'll all get their come-uppance.

YOU get over it.


At 12:26 PM, Blogger Josh said...

You and the goddamn Hostess Fruit Pies. Always with the Hostess Fruit Pies.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger Boba Fett said...

Erin's veins are filled with the same delicious filling you'd find in a Cadbury Egg.

That is NOT a fat joke.

That's a "you are round, brown, and sweet" joke.

Great, now she's gonna cut herself she can feel SOMETHING.

I miss you.



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