2008

And a new year has begun! A year so full of promise and opportunity, I should probably have changed the format of my blog to emphasize it! But I didn't.

This year - and I'm pretty sure I said this last year - I really want to focus on comedy and nothing else. Except of course my Blue Ribbon watermelons. Best in three counties!!!

And not just stand-up. I'm gonna try my hand at writing too. Any kind of writing - stories, sketches, monologue jokes, etc. Just to see what I come up with. I really want to step out of my comfort zone and try new things.

I know - I'm really brave.

This is something I wrote in the Onion "News in Brief" style:

Thanksgiving Leftovers Metaphor for Dying Father
CEDAR RAPIDS, IA: A week after Thanksgiving, local legal assistant and divorcee Donna Redman has begun drawing subconscious comparisons between the leftovers from her holiday meal and her 86 year old father; currently staying with her and losing his battle with pancreatic cancer. "I don't know if any of this is any good anymore; if it's even worth trying to save." Redman muttered to herself in front of the open refrigerator. "I can't eat this all by myself, it's too much for one person. And I can't ask the kids for help...they have their own lives and their own meals to plan. Besides, it would only upset [daughter] Karen to see the turkey this gray and flimsy."

After 20 minutes of gazing silently out the kitchen window, Redman reverently emptied the remaining turkey and mashed potatoes into the garbage can under the sink. "It was a good meal. A great meal. I'm actually surprised it's kept this long." Redman then dumped the last of the gravy down the drain, and went into the living room to tell her father how much she's always loved him.


It's my first attempt at that kind of writing structure, and there is certainly room for improvement. But it's a start! And I thought I'd post it for all to see and comment on, leaving myself totally vulnerable to criticism and spirit-breaking ridicule. Because nothing motivates me to succeed like the desire to prove someone wrong and make them rue the day they doubted me.

Ah, revenge. How many Blue Ribbon watermelon-growing competitions have we won together? Oh, that's right - all of them.