Comedian Erin Conroy: August 2006

Comedian Erin Conroy

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

From the Lobster Gang

Two birthday shout-outs today, for two very handsome men:

-Chris, my cruise director of drunkenness! You are the master of information and someone who will drink shots that I am too scared to try myself. Also, you're a catty bitch. And that's why I love you. Thanks for getting me to try new avenues for "meeting people", and even though it went horribly wrong-I'm still glad you made me try it. Love you!!! Oatmeal Bath!!!

-Danny, the humorist. Even though you have stepped to me on more than one occassion, and seem to have an affinity for everything "dork", I still adore you. One of the funniest and most genuinely nice guys ever-Danny would give you the plate his pizza was resting on if you ever needed it. So happy birthday, Rooo-yah! I'd puncture your starfish anytime!

By the way-the title of this entry is one line from the Birthday song the waiters sing to you when you are celebrating your birthday at the Red Lobster. How do I know this? Because it was either there, the Ground Round, or Pizza Hut where we spent all our birthdays as kids. That's right, we went all out in our quest to be the quintessential middle-class family growing up. And for that, I thank my parents.

Big showcase show tomorrow night!! I will be at the Comedy Village on West 3rd Street between Thompson and Sullivan tomorrow night for the 7pm show!! $12 at the door, and drink specials all night. Plus, delicious comedy. It's good for the soul, and will help lower your cholesterol. It might even help get you some action!!!

(Here's hoping....)

Monday, August 21, 2006

Snakes on Crack!

So the opening weekend of "Snakes on a Plane" has come and gone, and I am admittedly a little sad that the roller coaster ride has ended. Though the movie experience itself was the stuff dreams are made of!

On opening night Alicia and I found ourselves in a theatre full of people as excited as we were about this movie. (Read: Dorks) But it really added to the whole movie-going experience, because people were constantly hissing and screaming and flailing about. Yeah, folks. It was just that good. Gratuitous violence + Stereotypical characters + Predictable plotlines + Samuel L dropping 'm-er f-er' lines = The Feel Good Film of the Summer. Stop putting it off, everyone. Start living TODAY!

Busy enough week for me-out and about in the city seeing friends and consuming alcohol. The friends were just icing on the cake, really. I did another show at the New York Comedy Club on Tuesday, and for some reason they have asked me back again tomorrow night. I'm delighted, because it's a great room and I would love to keep it in rotation.

Looking to try some new material, or even a new frame of mind when I get up tomorrow night. I know that the comedy scene in NY is different than the scene was in DC; and bearing that in mind, I also know that I have to start all over again as far as convincing a lot of fellow comics that I have as much a right to be on stage as they do. It's a bit of a trial sometimes, but I understand that it's just something I have to accept and rise above if I want to make comedy my life.

Just as I accept and understand that while he seems very real to me, Cookie O'Puss is in fact an ice cream cake, and not a Slavic assassin sent by the Carvel people to kill me.

Too bad it doesn't help me sleep at night...

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Let's Get Something Straight...

If you are from Westchester County NY, you are NOT, I repeat NOT from "Upstate NY". No, you're not. Upstate NY is made up of Syracuse and Albany and Rochester and that jewel of a city-Buffalo. If you live in Westchester, you are the suburbs of New York City, and that's it.

Cease and desist with the "Upstate" shit. Learn your place.

Tore it up this weekend with Larry Poon and Frank Hong. I learned a lot about myself this weekend: my friends are great, I really wanna make a go of this "comedy career", and almost immediately upon entering most dance clubs I am annoyed. They're not my scene. Unless there's partial nudity and AMAZING dancing. And then, just barely my scene.

FREE COMEDY TONIGHT!!!! The New York Comedy Club, folks!!!!! Show is at 9pm, say my name at the door and pay no cover!!!!! East 24th Street between 2nd and 3rd avenues!!!!!

And there you have it. I just used up my exclamation point allowance for this posting. Which sucks, because now I can't accurately convey my excitement with regards to the following statement:

10 Days Til The Buffalo Irish Festival.


Thursday, August 10, 2006

She's Off To Go Boarding In A Place Where Her Tears Will Freeze

Project Runway. Who knew a show about making clothes would be so damned intriguing? Between the back-stabbing and the cheating and the plethora of hot pants, I think I have finally found a show to replace the hole in my heart left by M.A.S.H.

I had a show at the New York Comedy Club on Tuesday night. Interesting club, and very interesting vibe. I am becoming more and more aware of the subtle differences between DC and NY as far as comedy is concerned; as Tuesday's show was a lot more relaxed than I expected. My set went well, and all the comics I met were very cool.

They invited me back for the show this Tuesday, and if I want to have people come, they get in for free. What's that, you say? Free, I respond. No cover charge for anyone who mentions my name upon arrival at the Club. It's a really great way to try and get more people down to the shows, and also gives you that much more money for alcohol. Win-Win.

NY Comedy Club: Tuesday August 15th at 9pm. Come ooooooon, what else you gonna do?

Oh-and for all my fans in DC, (Melissa and Mike), I'll be back on Wednesday September 13th for a show at American University with the DCStandup All-Stars. These are the guys I did the CD with, and every single one of them is HILARIOUS. And 2/5 of them owe me money. I'm looking at YOU, Frank and Larry...

This post wasn't funny at all. Just show dates. That sucks. Here's a joke from my hippie friend JD to close it out:

a: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
b: How many?
a: Let's ride bikes!

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Madea's Interminable Bus Ride

So I was back in DC this weekend for the first time in about 7 months. It was great to see people and places, though a weekend is hardly enough time to try and get it all done.

But I did head to my friend Tim's farewell party, where I saw a whole mess of people from college who I haven't seen in years. It was bizarre and fantastic and awkward (one guy) all at the same time. It's weird how a lot of time can pass with some friends, and then you can pick up right where you left off again.

Oh, and Tim managed to get himself thrown out of the bar, and I don't know that I could be prouder of him.

The bus rides from NY to DC are never enjoyable. I mean, it's a BUS-what do you want? But for $40 roundtrip, guaranteed seats and the promise of "first-run movies"; you can't really find a lot of faults with the Vamoose Bus Lines I tend to take. (Exceptions made for when you're heading back on a Sunday night with a wicked hangover and the bus driver puts in a movie called 'Madea Goes To Jail', and follows it with 'Madea's Family Reunion', both movies being played at higher-than-normal volumes, and your head hurts so bad, but there's no way to not watch it, so you stare at the screen with your head pounding and you weep silently.) Yeah...that bus sure is a steal.

The new season of 'Flavor of Love' has begun on VH1, and apparently the first episode is already rife with horror. I've heard what happens, though I have yet to see the episode, and believe me-this show is better than anything ever put on television. Find out when it's on, and thank me later via a Cookie Bouquet. I like chewy chocolate chip cookies. But you knew that already.

I have a show tonight. This show is at the New York Comedy Club on East 24th between 2nd and 3rd and starts at 9pm. You should come down. Say my name at the door and pay only $7.

Say my name at the pawn shop on 86th and you'll get a boot in your ribs.

Friday, August 04, 2006


This is my 69th blog entry. Tee Hee....69.

On my way back down to DC this weekend!! Sooo excited-it's been far too long. Looking forward to seeing all my old friends, and drinking enough to kill a small Scandinavian village. Ah, good times.


Wednesday, August 02, 2006

I Got Shows...In Different Area Codes...

That's a lie. I think they're all in the 212 area code.

Next Tuesday August 8th I am doing a show at the NY Comedy Club. Then Friday September 1st, I'll be at the Laugh Lounge Comedy Club.

These shows are both bringer shows (groan) which is why I'm mentioning them. If anybody reading this lives in NY and looooves comedy and wants to go see a show-lemme know. I need some bodies there.

I'm really bad at asking people to come to my shows. I always feel guilty about it. I don't want to be the comedic equivalent of the Public Broadcasting Service, constantly hitting people up for support. I mean sure-there are some similarities between myself and PBS. For example: we both turn out quality entertainment that focuses on culture and education, and we both believe supporting our nation's teachers is top priority. However, I choose not to associate myself with Dragon Tales and Clifford the Big Red Dog; and PBS hasn't been banned from three different Red Lobster restaurants for "lewd conduct".

Hush puppies are delicious.

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

# 41

So this weekend I got the chance to re-live my blurry and SoCo-soaked college years.

My friend Doug invited me to the Dave Matthews Band concert in Hartford with him on Saturday. Doug is a huuuge Dave Matthews fan-I think this was his 18th time seeing them live. But I guess that's how it is with that band-you either hate them, own one of their CDs and recognize a few of their songs (me), or see them live every chance you get and think at least once a day about how you would take a bullet for Dave (Doug and easily about 42% of our generation).

It reminded me of college because Doug actually introduced me to Dave Matthews when we were in school; but also because you couldn't walk down a dorm hallway (at GW at least) without hearing "Crash" or "Say Goodbye" or "Ants Marching" blasting out of a minimum of 4 rooms. Dave Matthews is to most college kids what insulin is to morbidly obese people; they just end up needing it.

And most of his fans at the concert on Saturday were college-aged or younger. Man, I felt old. But maybe that's just because I wasn't peeing behind a dumpster, or draped over the hood of my boyfriend's Civic or eating a glowstick. Maybe I just forgot how to be cool. But after stepping over my 97th Natty Ice can in the parking lot on the way to the concert, I realized that maybe the fine art of tailgating had passed over a graduating class or two.

But the show was great, and Doug drives like a maniac. It's also been a GW-reminiscent couple of days because I've heard from three friends from college that I haven't talked to in months and years. I think it's all in preparation for Tim's going away party this Saturday. A lot of us are gonna be together in the same room for the first time in years, and I predict a lot of alcohol consumption and stories that start with, "I never told you, but...".

Go Colonials!!!

I watched the first season of "Weeds" this weekend. It's the Showtime original series about a suburban Mom who sells weed to pay the bills. It's fantastic. Watch it.